I read a devotional today on Proverbs31.org that spoke to me. Instead of making a New Years resolution about losing weight or changing habits, what if you were to focus on One Word. Focus on one word this year and applying it to everything you do. See what God does through you and this word.
So many times I know I begin my focus in the wrong area, away from God. Or I have every intention of keeping the focus on God and I end up straying away or forgetting what my original focus was. I tell myself that this year I will get back in shape, lose weight, read the Bible everyday, and inevitably I fail and I disappoint myself and others.
Choosing ONE WORD to think about, ponder on, learn about, and use daily might just be a great way to help me focus and gain confidence. And who knows what else??? Who knows where God will take me with my ONE WORD.
Well, I fell face first off the blogging proverbial cliff. No excuses. I just quit blogging cold turkey. I wish there were other things in life I could quit cold turkey. Like sugar, I know how can I say that? Well my body would probably thank me and I just might get to say goodbye to those muffins that have hung on to me way too long.
So back to the 'no blogging' thing. I think I got overwhelmed with my own personal pressure I put on this blog, on myself, on the life I was living or not living around me. I always put too much pressure on myself and way too much expectation and that is where I fail. completely. always. Our pastor said once and it has stuck with me. "Some of the greatest frustrations in life come from unmet expectations." So here I am starting the new year with a new blog entry.
To Begin Again.
A reboot, a restart, a re_______ you fill in the blank.
I am not a new years resolution kinda girl. I get so disappointed in myself when I fail that making resolutions are not very fun for me. So I am going to start small and I am going to try to remind myself to not have so many expectations on myself, others, life.
Peek - a - boo
So there you have it. I'm slowly coming back into the blogosphere. More for me than for anyone or anything else.
So do you ever feel like you are doing or you are trying to do 50 million things at one time and you never really get one of them done. Yep, that is me right now. I am trying to maintain a house, feed a family, change diapers, give baths, play with kids, work part-time, garden, make artsy fartsy stuff, blog and the list keeps going. Because I am trying to do it all, I have a mound of dishes to do, dust that is building up, crafty projects that are half done, dinner is getting later and later... Sigh. As I type this, I am thinking that I need to work on one thing and get that done first. Yes, I will be interrupted. If you have kids that are still at home with you, you know that you always get interrupted just as you get all of your craft supplies out or get the dish water ready or fill up the watering can. Whatever you have started, just wait a minute and that little voice around the corner will be saying "momma, I need..." And most of the time I am glad to answer that little voice or little baby cry. But I have my moments. Grrrr. I just wanted to finish something, anything!!
She calls it procrastination. For me, I call it distraction with a hint of procrastination. But for you it could be all procrastination.
You get up in the morning determined to start the day off right. Today I am going to go on a run. You get your shoes out, your running shirt on and realize your favorite workout pants aren't clean. Then you decide, well crap I need to do laundry. So you start the laundry. Just as you are pouring the milk into your cereal the babies start to cry. Guess it is soggy cereal for me, again. Change diapers, try to find clean clothes for the girls, and go to make bottles. Then you realize, well crap there aren't any clean bottles. Now you get to listen to the screaming hunger pains of the twin girls as you clean their bottles. And it keeps on going like that, all day, until you lay down at night and think... what did I actually get done today? Crap!!! I forgot to switch the laundry!!!
My lovely sister in law sent me an email today that really hit me to the core. I really can not say much more than what was said in this daily devotional from Renee Swope. My search for significance is really about "becoming the real me."
I hope you are as blessed by reading this devotion as I was and still am.
"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb." Psalm 139:13 (NIV)
What do you love to do? If finances were unlimited and failure was unlikely, what would be your dream?
The facilitator of our team-building activity asked our small group to answer these questions. I didn't have an answer. So I decided to start praying we'd run out of time before it got to me. But just in case I had to answer, I listened to everyone else describe their dreams, hoping to get ideas.
One wanted to be the first female president of the United States. Another friend said she'd always wanted to sing in a Christian rock band. I knew I was in trouble.
Here I was, 32-years-old at the time, and I didn't know who I was or what my dreams were. Eventually everyone looked at me for a response. I stumbled over my words. Then I finally admitted I didn't really know what I loved to do.
I didn't have a dream. I'd never taken time to think about or answer those kinds of questions. Instead, I had always tried to be who others wanted or needed me to be. But honestly, I wasn't very good at it. I often had this uneasy feeling in my heart and a sense of just not being happy. And I was a constant candidate for burn out.
I wasn't living out the truth held in our key verse today: "[God] created my inmost being; [He] knit me together in my mother's womb." (Psalm 139:13, NIV)
I was not designed to be who others expected me to be, or even wanted me to be. I was created to become all that God planned for me to be. But I was lost in the process of my becoming.
After I fumbled around looking for an answer during our team-building time, our facilitator encouraged me to ask God what His dreams were for my life.
I took her advice and started the process of becoming the "real me" who had gotten buried in the busyness of life and people pleasing.
As I read books that talked about discovering our passions, gifts and personality traits, I started to identify what I liked. I recognized strengths that came natural for me, and learned what I needed emotionally to encourage my heart.
For the first time, I realized there was an important reason I was who I was — with my passionate preferences and mixed bag of emotions. Instead of wanting to be like women I knew and admired, I sensed God wanted to use the unique way He made me.
Isn't it easy to neglect ourselves to meet the needs of everyone around us, and call it self-sacrifice? It sounds godly. But in doing so we risk shutting down a place in our soul where God's dreams and gifts are waiting to be revealed.
So, how well do you know the real you? Have you ever taken time to think about what you like to do? What would make your heart come alive if you had the confidence and resources to do it?
Although it might feel self-seeking, it's actually God-seeking to take time to get to know the woman He created you to be. Remember God had a plan in mind when He made you. When you surrender your unique passions and personality to Him, God will use them to guide you towards His dreams for your life.
Lord, I want to know the woman You had in mind when You created me. I don't want to grow old and never know Your purpose for my life. Show me Your dreams for me so I can offer what You want to give to those around me. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
Can you answer Renee's questions for yourself? How well do you know the Real You? Have you ever taken the time to think about what you like to do? What would make your heart come alive if you had the confidence and resources to do it?
Today I am thankful for three healthy babies of my own. I am reminded that life is so precious even before we make it into this world. My friend Lynne is 19 weeks pregnant and found out that she and her husband will be welcoming their 4th baby girl into the world. Lynne has been told that their baby girl has a very healthy heart, but at the same time they found out that this baby also has hydrocephalus.She has water on her tiny brain. I can only imagine what Lynne and Brian are going through. All the emotions and questions that must be coming up and out. So if you would please pray for the Holloman family I know they would greatly appreciate it.
I'm a little late getting to this post. Seeing how it is already Wednesday. Oh well, better late than never, eh?
My Sunday was filled with A LOT of emotions. Don't get me wrong, it was a great day. I just felt like I was riding the roller coaster of emotions. Sunday, as most of you know and celebrated, was Mother's Day. A day to honor the hard working and loving mother in your life.
My day started with not wanting to open my peepers. I was not looking forward to the day. But some sweet kisses from my son had me up. He said in his most quiet voice (which I don't hear very often), "Good morning momma. Happy Mother's Day." How could I resist that. He left a card beside my pillow and flew out of the room. Next it was my hubby who came in and left a box. I got up slowly and examined the presents left beside me. I opened the envelope my son left and was excited as I read the outside. It was a sweet card...
Doesn't this look nice? A nice relaxing bath. ahhhh
I should have known...
darn.
But what was inside the card sort of made up for the fact that I wouldn't have peace and quiet for a while. I got a Hobby Lobby gift card. :-) For all my little Artsy Fartsy projects lately.
I opted not to go to church because our baby girls are a little under the weather. So I got to rest a bit more and have some girl time. When the boys got back from church, I was presented with a beautiful rose and a marigold that my son planted in a paper cup. Next, our plan was to find a place we could actually sit down and eat relatively quickly, then go to visit my hubby's mom, go pick up our bikes from storage, visit my mom, and finally visit my dad. So we decided on Paradise Bakery and we ran into my hubby's family there! We got to eat a great lunch and spend time with my MIL. It was so nice! Two for one! After lunch we picked up our bikes and headed to the cemetery. I was not looking forward to the visit. Upon arriving at the cemetery, I got a carnation for Mother's Day. Which did not really make me feel any better about what we were doing. I am so new to this and wasn't sure what I should be doing or thinking. Although what made me feel just an insy weensy better, was that a lot of other people decided to visit their mom's too. As my hubby stopped and parked the car, I took a deep breath, gathered myself, and shoved the door open. I made the walk to the place that my mom's body is now resting. It was like I had tunnel vision. I had to focus on what I was doing or I was going to lose it. I knew, before coming, that there would be flowers there. I had talked to my dad the day before and he mentioned going to see mom. So the flowers were there he placed out and some tulips were there too. To this day, I am not sure who put the tulips there. I cleaned up around her and my dad's marker. Picking up petals and putting new water in the vase. I placed my rose and carnation that I got early that day in her vase. And then I stared. I remember my hubby praying with me, but I have no idea what he said. It was not until I heard my son asking my hubby questions that I came out of my daze. I asked my hubby if I could be alone for a bit. And he gathered the kids and took them back to the car. All alone, staring at a bronze marker with my mom's name on it, tears streaming down my face, I asked her for help and guidance. Because I am feeling like an untrained momma.
After that emotional visit, I collected myself and off we went to visit with my dad. We had a wonderful visit that included seeing my Grandma, Aunt, Cousin, and dinner. After leaving my dad's house, I found myself very quiet and without words. Which some days seems the norm for me anymore. My hubby asked how I was feeling. I contemplated that question for a while and decided that I can't describe it and nor do I want to try.
Overall my Sunday was sweet. Filled with presents, flowers, hugs and love.
Okay, come on, you know you have them. Those little things you do in life that you really don't want to many people to know about. Or maybe no one at all. Those guilty pleasures, we all have them. It's like what I am teaching my son, it's like butt cracks, everyone has one. Yep I said it. So I know you have some guilty pleasures.
I really don't know what I want to get out of this post. Maybe I want to be able to confess my little obsessions, so I can be released from the torment ... oh heck no. I want to hear about your guilty pleasures so I feel better about mine. HA! So I am expecting some good stuff on here. I know, I know you are probably saying to yourself... why in the world would I want to confess my little secrets on a blog... because it is all in fun. We can all get a little red faced together without even having a drink! I want to first say, no judging will be had on this blog. No shaking of the head or rolling of the eyes. You don't judge me and I won't judge you. Okay lets have some fun. Cuz we all know a little fun is good medicine. Ready, set, go... time to tell those embarrassing, lame, silly little things about ourselves.
I am one of those people who are fascinated by the Royals. I loved reading and watching exclusives on Princess Diana and Prince Charles and their crazy lives. I like watching all of the coverage on Prince William and soon to be Princess Catherine. That lifestyle entrances me. From my view, it looks like a fairytale. Or maybe it is because William and Kate are around my age. And get this, when I was younger (much younger) I dreamt that one day I would be Princess Selena. Because you know Prince William was going to find me in the far away distant land of Indiana, sweep me up on his white steed and take me away to Windsor Castle. Yes, you can laugh, because I am. Guilty pleasure number one.
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Angry Birds If you have an iPhone or iPod Touch you know what Angry Birds is. If you don't, you need to know. This is my favorite thing to do to pass the time away. I love the sound effects the best. The oinking of the pigs. How they sneer and laugh at you when you didn't wipe them all out, cracks me up. Being able to sling birds through the air is so fun! Watch out, you may have too much fun, disregard everyone in your presence, and become addicted to this game.
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Bohemian Rhapsody - Queen
Is this the real life?
Is this just fantasy? Caught in a landslide, No escape from reality....
I see a little silhouette of a man,
Scaramouch, Scaramouch, will you do the Fandango
Thunderbolt and lightning, very, very frightening me
(Galileo) Galileo (Galileo) Galileo, Galileo Figaro...
I crank this song up every time I hear it. Enough said.
Merek at the Krispy Kreme Bakery
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My fourth guilty pleasure is Krispy Kremes Doughnuts
These wonderfully, sugary, heart stopping, cholesterol raising, diabetic coma inducing little pleasures are sooooo good. And the best way to have them is right out of the oven at the Krispy Kremes bakery. I have only had the pleasure to go to the bakery twice in my short life, but oh it was soooo mouth watering good.
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Figure Skating. Yes that is what I said. Figure skating. C'mon you can admit it. You like to watch poetry on ice. I watch it every Winter Olympics. From Scott Hamilton, Kristi Yamaguchi, Brian Boitano, Sasha Cohen, Michelle Kwan and Evan Lysacek. The graceful dance, the elaborate costumes, the amazingly difficult jumps, and who can forget the controversy. I think it deserves a 10! Hello?!?!? You don't watch figure skating....I'm the only one? Hmmmm. Shoot.
My sixth guilty pleasure is Twilight. Don't give me that look. I love this series of books. The movies do not do the books justice, but how can you make a vampire shine like little diamonds and make it look realistic. So it doesn't upset me too much that the film industry can't get it right. Or the fact that they leave out parts. Most people wouldn't sit in a theatre for the length of time that they would have to make a movie with all the parts of a book. Like I said, most. ;-) But as serious as I can be, I love the way Twilight is written. It brings a whole new look to vampires and fantasy. In a non-slut-filled way. I am addicted and I don't care what anyone says. I hop on Stephanie Meyer's website every once in a while to see if there is anything new coming out. I have her other book, The Host, and it is super good too! P.S. I am on team Edward. I didn't say team Rob, let's make that clear. Team Edward.
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Bags
I like all kinds of bags, purses, backpacks, wallets... I could keep going. I don't know why I am obsessed with bags?? And the irony of it all, is that I hate carrying a bag into a store. What? I know. I am crazy. I just like the look of bags. And I like to buy bags. But I don't like to use them (all the time). Again, what? I try to get out of using the diaper bag for the twins each time I go into the store. It is one more thing I have to take in with me and keep track of. But inevitably I will need something out of it, like most importantly a bottle or a diaper. Sigh. What is wrong with me? :-P
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McAlister's Sweet Tea is theeeee beeeessssstttttt sweet tea ever. period. This yummy goodness is so incredibly sweet and addicting. Oh and never fear, you can buy it buy the gallon. ;-)
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I love my sleep and I do my best sleep on my Jersey Knit sheets. It is just like wearing an old t-shirt, without the smell. Ahhh.
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I can watch cartoons all day long. Never mind that I have kids and they like to watch cartoon too. We watch a lot of PBS Kids and Qubo. But the other night I was flipping through the channels and came across the Qubo channel and they were play She-Ra!!! Oh you are kidding me, I thought. Then I said YES! And I watched the whole cartoon. She-Ra Princess of Power and defender of the Crystal Castle.
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Ice, Ice Baby. Hehehehe. I know all of the words to Vanilla Ice's hit Ice, Ice Baby. And I ain't scared to sing them. Out loud. Or dance to the song. Just ask my cousins. They can tell you. I think Vanilla 'Selena' Ice made an appearance at their wedding.
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Okay last two. I know there are more, but one can only handle so much in one day.
I like to watch Kathy Lee and Hoda,in the morning. They are corny, they crack me up, and most of the time give some good advice.
Last but not least. Ellen. She is HIL. AR. I. OUS. Hilarious. I laugh out loud at her and her crazy antics. The funny things she makes 'stars' do, the crazy games she has her audience play, and the amazing love she shows everyone is so great. One day I will go to the Ellen Show.
Okay now it is your turn. Let's hear it. What is is your little secret pleasure(s)? It's okay to let your hair down for just a bit to humor yourself, and me, and maybe the 3 other people that read this blog. I'm waiting...
Honesty. Are we really truly honest with ourselves, with other people? I wonder sometimes if people really know what honesty really is? How do you know if someone is being honest with you? How do you know what you read is true and honest? How do you know what you hear on TV is honest?
It can be really hard to be honest. I think most of the time it is hard to be honest because we are fearful. Fearful that what we are going to say out-loud is going to hurt. Hurt ourselves and hurt the people around us. And frankly, I do not think some people want to hear the honest truth. They would rather not know and live in their own little fantasy world.
I watch my son's face when he is confronted about something that he has done. His face speaks it all. It contorts in all sorts of directions and his eyes look scared. I reassure him that it is good to be honest, that he will be in much deeper trouble if he isn't honest. And so far, in his four years, he still comes clean with what he has done. I pray his honesty will stick around for a long time.
Have you ever done something that you are so scared and upset about that you can't do anything else, but think about it. Worry about it. Oh man I have. This is just one little measly example, but I was so distraught about the whole thing I just about made myself sick. During the time I was living with my in-laws I would help clean the house and do the dishes. I was loading the dish washer with some of my mother in-laws nice goblet style glasses and wouldn't you know it, one broke. Oh the pit in my stomach was huge. I just knew that she probably got them in Alaska years and years ago. I could have let the matter go and not say a word, but I just couldn't. I was honest and let her know what I had done. And of course I was right. She got the set years ago in Alaska when she lived there. Grrrrrrr. But she was so nice and gracious about it. All the while, I know she was disappointed. The pit in my stomach eventually went away and all was good and right in my little world once again.
Dictionary.com states that honesty is: 1. the quality or fact of being honest; uprightness and fairness. 2. truthfulness, sincerity, or frankness. 3. freedom from deceit or fraud.
Are you being honest today? Even with the little stuff. If you can't be honest with the little stuff, how can you be honest with the big stuff in life? Deuteronomy 25:13-16 says you must live accurate and honest because God does not like dishonesty. And I would venture to say, that every last one of us that have been lied to, would say we do not like dishonesty either. It is ugly.
In my little fantasy world everyone would be honest. Politicians, leaders, businesses, family members, everyone would be honest. No one would cheat you out of things. I wonder what the world would look like if we were all honest with one another? Maybe it would be uglier? Maybe the things are sugar coated now would melt away?
It may hurt at the time, but I have a whole lot of respect for people who can be honest with me. I would much rather someone tell me, uhhh are you sure you should wear that? I'm not so sure that vehicle is a good choice, or Selena Marie, shut up and listen to yourself. Thank God I have had all of those things said to me at some time in my life. And I thank God for the people who have said it. When I was younger, to make sure someone would know that I was being completely honest or they were being honest, we would pinkie swear. Because that is what telling the truth was all about. Pinkie swearing. I wonder if we could get some of our politicians to pinkie swear?
While typing up this post I decided to try and find a 'picture of honesty' and that is exactly what I googled. And you wouldn't believe what I found. Did you know there is an actual day called Honesty Day?? I had no idea! Honesty Day is celebrated to encourage people to be honest on April 30th. Wow. We have to have a day to realize and recognize we need to be honest. Wow. Check it out on the Wiki. So start practicing now because Honesty Day is coming soon. I also found a blog called Daily Rant with a post about honesty that I like: Daily Rant.
In all honesty, I am not looking forward to Mother's Day. I keep hearing all the advertisements on what you should buy for your mother. I know it is a celebration of mothers. This is my first Mother's Day as a momma of 3. But honestly, I am just reminded that I do not have my mother to share it with. But I will try my best to be present for my kids and my best will just have to be okay. For now, I will have to be satisfied with remembering the phrase my mom would always say to me. I am sure you have heard it too. Honesty is the best policy.
What to do on a Tuesday night? See if your family of 5 can fit in a 3x3 closest. Not your idea of fun? Well, not mine either. But nonetheless that is what we got to do last night. It is tornado season. Of course they say that tornadoes can happen anytime of the year, but we see the mass majority of tornadoes during the spring time.
Did you know?
Each year, about a thousand tornadoes touch down in the United States, far more than any other country.
Waterspouts are tornadoes that form over a body of water.
Knives and forks have been found embedded in tree trunks flung from a tornado.
Usually a tornado starts off as a white or gray cloud but if it stays around for a while, the dirt and debris it sucks up eventually turns it into black one.
Tornado winds are the fastest winds on Earth.
A Tornado in Oklahoma once destroyed a whole motel. People later found the motel’s sign in Arkansas.
In 1928, a tornado in Kansas plucked the feathers right off some chickens.
Some tornadoes make a considerable amount of noise while others make very little. It depends on the objects a tornado might hit or carry. A tornado moving along an open plain may make very little noise.
The meteorological factors that drive tornadoes make them more likely at some times than at others. They occur more often in late afternoon, when thunderstorms are common, and are more prevalent in spring and summer.
Safety Tips
• Prepare for tornadoes by gathering emergency supplies including food, water, medications, batteries, flashlights, important documents, road maps, and a full tank of gasoline.
• When a tornado approaches, anyone in its path should take shelter indoors—preferably in a basement or an interior first-floor room or hallway.
• Avoid windows and seek additional protection by getting underneath large, solid pieces of furniture.
• Avoid automobiles and mobile homes, which provide almost no protection from tornadoes.
• Those caught outside should lie flat in a depression or on other low ground and wait for the storm to pass.
Long story short. Get the heck out of the way of a tornado and get in your 3x3 closet!
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