Sweet Sunday: When I look to the Sky

“Music speaks what cannot be expressed, soothes the mind and gives it rest, heals the heart and makes it whole, flows from heaven to the soul.” ~ Author Unknown

Music has a way of moving me emotionally and physically.  I listen to music a lot.  Generally speaking I have background music playing all the time. 
A day last week I was listening to Pandora.com, an internet radio station.  A song that I have heard a lot before came on.  Listening to the song now, in this time of my life, hit me in such a different way.  Due to life's twists and turns.  My Sweet Sunday is dedicated to this song and my mom.  

 Image found on iTunes

The song is When I Look to the Sky by Train.


When I Look to the Sky (Radio Version) - Single - Train



[Verse 1]
When it rains it pours and opens doors
And floods the floors we thought would always keep us safe and dry
And in the midst of sailing ships we sink our lips into the ones we love
That have to say goodbye 

[Chorus:]
And as I float along this ocean
I can feel you like a notion that won't seem to let me go 

Cause when I look to the sky something tells me you're here with me
And you make everything alright 
And when I feel like I'm lost something tells me you're here with me
And I can always find my way when you are here 

[Verse 2]
And every word I didn't say that caught up in some busy day
And every dance on the kitchen floor we didn't have before
And every sunset that we'll miss I'll wrap them all up in a kiss
And pick you up in all of this when I sail away 

[Chorus:]
And as I float along this ocean
I can feel you like a notion that I hope will never leave

[Verse 3]
Whether I am up or down or in or out or just plane overhead
Instead it just feels like it is impossible to fly
But with you I can spread my wings
to see me over everything that life may send me 
When I am hoping it won't pass me by 

And when I feel like there is no one that will ever know me
there you are to show me

Cause when I look to the sky something tells me you're here with me
And you make everything alright 
And when I feel like I'm lost something tells me you're here with me
And I can always find my way when you are here [X2]



Lyrics from Lyrics007.com


I lost my mom in January to Melanoma Cancer and I have to believe that she is still here with me. 


Selena 

Searching for Significance. Part 1

Buchart Gardens. Victoria, B.C.

When did it happen?  When was it that women decided (or maybe it was men decided) that women had to do more than just taking care of their family.  As if taking care of the house, the bills, the kids, the husband, etc., etc., etc., was not enough.  I ask this, not because I think that women doing other things than solely taking care of their household is the only way.  But because I struggle with the feeling that I need to be doing more than just seeing to my family.  Isn't that enough?  I mean I have 3 sweet, but demanding kiddos.  I have a hubby that loves me unconditionally, but has a hard time staying organized.  I am blessed by a God that loves me, but I find myself in a 'once in a while relationship'. The roof over my head is great, but I am constantly cleaning the inside. The food on the table is good most of the time, but sometimes I just do not want to make anything.   And yet I still feel like I need to be doing more.  More what?  Something, anything that provides or makes me feel significant.  Ohhh, maybe what I struggle with is, for whatever reason, that I feel like I do not get enough significance out of just being a mom, wife, daughter, sister...  Ew, that sounds ugly.  And I do not like it.

I know it is here somewhere.  Where did I put it?  I feel like I am searching for my significance like I laid down my car keys and I can't seem to find them.

Growing up, I didn't think about the need to be significant.  I just did.  My significance was in what I was supposed to be focusing on: school, sports, and family.  That was all I was supposed to be worried about.  At the same time I felt like I was reaching for a higher purpose.  I was building myself up to become something more.  The same happened in college.  I was there for a reason.  To complete my four year degree and make something of myself. While in college, I helped with a local youth group.  I went on trips and went to youth camp with them.  And God moved in me every time.  I floated away somewhere after that.  I got married and invested myself into my husband and building our life.  A new me.  A new place, a new adventure, a new church, new, new, new.  What happened to the old me?  The driven, stubborn, head strong, woman that knew what she wanted and felt like she had significance?

I want to find that woman again.  Soon.



Because I feel like I am opening a can of worms with myself.  I am taking this one slow.  So there will probably be a part 2...3...4...who knows.  Please, I encourage comments.  I promise I will answer them.  Part of having an area to comment is to gain some encouragement from those who are reading.  Thanks for reading.

This Is The Stuff

I can't stand it when I lose something.   I lost the remote to the t.v. today.  I mean seriously.  I just had it in my hand and bam, it was gone.  Of course I laid it down somewhere, but I swear it grew legs.  My son and I searched the whole house.  I was thinking, trying to remember.  Did I take it?  Did he take it?  Did I leave it in the kitchen, the bathroom, the office?  Where the heck did it go. This went on for a while.  I finally asked my son to look under the couch.  "Found it!!" He said.   Finally!

I am sure most of us have had those moments.  Now I could have lived without the remote.  I could have even lived without seeing t.v. for a while, I think. ;-)  But man it irritates the crap out of me.

I recently heard a song on the KLove radio station that I thought was really corny. Then after hearing it a couple of more times and really taking the time to listen to the words, I found out that I can really relate.  Some of you may know the song by Francesca Battistelli - This Is the Stuff

The lyrics:

I lost my keys in the great unknown
And call me please 'Cuz I can't find my phone

This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff that's getting to me lately
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use

45 in a 35
Sirens and fines while I'm running behind
Whoa

This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff that's getting to me lately
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use

So break me of impatience
Conquer my frustrations
I've got a new appreciation
It's not the end of the world
Oh Oh Oh

This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff
Someone save me
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
And I've gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use

Oh Oh Oh Oh
This is the stuff You use

(lyrics from newreleasetuesday.com)

I hope you find whatever you are looking for, but in the process, remember how big you are blessed.  And that it's not the end of the world.